☠ ic contact ☠

[oorah]

⌲ call . text . video . voicemail . spam

Comments

[shittier]

what are the odds of that shit

[ to lose your wife that way then your next one get shot... ]

well since were on the topic of exes and guns, i shot my ex in the face with a shotgun

[oorah]

just lucky i guess.

and i'm sure you had a good reason

[shittier]

[ wow she is not prepared for the emotions that come with his response. ]

maybe. i don't know

[oorah]

is that why you don't date anymore?

[ wow they really are two shit peas in a shit pod. ]

[shittier]

one of many. i'm not really girlfriend material, or the type of girl you bring home to your family

[ it only took her sleeping with her super to figure that last part out... ]

[oorah]

[ good thing frank doesn't have one of those? anymore?? ]

learned that the hard way too. this woman she had a son. i don't know what i was thinking.

[ his bullshit almost got rex's mom killed after he promised her it wouldn't come to her house. he can't make that mistake again. ]

[shittier]

you weren't. that's what makes dating and relationships so terrible

[ it's a massive cloud over your judgment, and she has little to none of that as it is. ]

[oorah]

so this would be a no strings attached situation

[ she did say it was "no big deal." but her follow-up is equally accurate: sex is a big deal for frank. he can't change that. he'd tried. ]

i'm even worse at that than everything else

[shittier]

[ okay.

it takes her a minute to answer that. she's not really sure what to say back because... what? is this a conversation about dating now? she can't help but laugh. he sounds like such a romantic right now, and she assumed he was anything. just goes to show you how much people can surprise you. ]

what exactly is it that you're hoping to get from all of this??

[oorah]

calm down jones. i'm not asking you on a date.

[ well... sort of?? whatever. ]

this is why i figured you were putting me over.

[ the real truth: he assumed the whole fucking thing was a joke from the get-go. ]

[shittier]

at least if you were i'd have some kind of idea of what is happening right now

[ she's sighing just like she did when he didn't believe her before. ]

are you always like this? deflecting shit so you don't have to answer to it?

[oorah]

pretty much. yeah.

[ but she's been no bullshit with him, something he only realized long after the fact. he's not used to talking with people that way, not anymore. ]

the truth is i figured you were looking for something easy. maybe you were and there's nothing wrong with that. but getting mixed up with me is anything but. i'm an unholy goddamn mess

[ the beauty of frank castle? he sees absolutely no irony in saying this to jessica jones of all people. ]

2/2

[oorah]

[ ...wait for it ]

and that's just my face

boo 0/10

[shittier]

you are talking to the mayor of being a hot fucking mess, so, that doesn't really mean anything to me

[ his mess is what makes her attracted to him because it's relatable for her. but she definitely questions her judgment after having that clear thought process about it... ]

and it is easy because i don't care

about your mess, i mean. with both face and everything else that comes with you

you're not the biggest pain in my ass so i guess that makes you somewhat likable

<3 he's enjoying this sorry jessica messica

[oorah]

that might be the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me

that is the absolute cutest name and i am here for it

[shittier]

i don't say nice things

sometimes i just say things that are less mean than normal

it's her legal name ok

[oorah]

i kind of like when you're mean anyway

[ oops ]

[shittier]

good, because i don't have a whole lot else going for me

[oorah]

i would disagree with you but you're kind of scary when you want to be.

[ shock surprise another thing he likes ]

[shittier]

going by that logic there were a lot of moments i could have hit you tonight and i didn't, so

i think i deserve a little more credit than that

[oorah]

in your defense there's not a lot of open real estate left. [ to hit, that is. ]

for what it's worth. i do. give you credit.

[ probably nothing, right? she said she didn't care, but he's not sure he believes that either. ]

[shittier]

yeah? for what, exactly?

[oorah]

for doing shit no one else will.

[shittier]

[ sorry, she can't resist this one. ]

you mean like you

[oorah]

you're not like me.

you wish you were like me

[ one day someone will explain how flirting works to frank castle and his reality as he knows it will collapse in on itself like a house of cards. ]